Question: If an individual is terminally ill and is suffering very much, must one and his household pray for this person’s recovery in any event?
Answer: This matter is discussed at length in the Sefer Ruach Yaakov (by the author of the Halacha Yomit, Harav Yaakov Sasson Shlit”a) and we shall only discuss it briefly here.
The Words of Our Prophets and Sages of the Gemara
We find some instances in the writings of the prophets where people prayed for someone to die. Indeed, Eliyahu the prophet said (Melachim I, Chapter 19), “Now Hashem, this is too much; take my soul.” Similarly, Yonah the prophet said (Yonah, Chapter 4), “And now Hashem, please take my soul.”
We find a similar idea mentioned many times in the words of our Sages, for instance, in the Gemara (Ta’anit 23a) regarding Choni the Circle-Maker who beseeched Hashem to take his soul and indeed, Hashem accepted his prayer and took his soul.
The Words of Rabbeinu Nissim
Rabbeinu Nissim (commonly referred to as the Ran) writes in his commentary on Masechet Nedarim (40a) that sometimes a person is terminally ill and an extension of his life only causes him more suffering, pain, and anguish. In such a case, although suffering is very beneficial in cleansing one of his sins as we have written in the previous Halacha, nevertheless, one should not cause the ill person prolonged suffering; on the contrary, one should pray to Hashem to save this individual from his suffering by allowing him to pass on and pray that afterwards, Hashem should shower him with great goodness and blessing. Several other Rishonim write likewise.
The Explanation Offered by Maran Shlit”a
Maran Harav Ovadia Yosef Shlit”a explains (in his Responsa Yabia Omer, Volume 2, Yoreh De’ah, Chapter 24) that although there is certainly a Torah prohibition to bring about another human being’s death in any manner and even if the person is gravely ill, one who causes his death is considered a murderer and his actions are equal to one who murders a healthy young man, nevertheless, since one is not performing any physical action and is only praying to Hashem verbally for this sick individual to die, there is no prohibition involved in doing so at all.
Maran Shlit”a writes in his Chazon Ovadia-Avelut (Part I) that a great number of Acharonim rule in accordance with the Ran’s opinion. It seems that this should indeed be the ruling, halachically speaking.
The Concern of the Author of the Shevet Ha’Levi
Nevertheless, Hagaon Harav Shmuel Ha’Levi Wosner Shlit”a writes in the Sefer Shevet Ha’Levi (Volume 10, Chapter 292, Section 3) that it is not possible for everyone to follow the Ran’s ruling, for it is very difficult to discern when a person reaches the stage of illness where one should pray for him to die. It sometimes seems that it would be better for the individual to die than to stay alive but this is indeed not the case and staying alive will benefit him greatly.
The Law Halachically Speaking
Halachically speaking, Maran Shlit”a writes that if one sees that the individual is terminally ill and prolonging his life will only cause him great distress, one should pray to Hashem to have mercy on the ill person and do whatever He feels is best for him, for we cannot possibly know this. When praying, one should say that may Hashem have mercy on this person and allow him to live, however, if the decree upon him has already been sealed, may Hashem remove this person’s suffering and do as He sees fit.
“Even a Sharp Sword”
Although we have written previously that the Gemara (Berachot 10a) states that even if a sharp sword rests on one’s throat, one should still not lose hope and pray for mercy, nevertheless, Maran Shlit”a explains in his Sefer Ma’or Yisrael that with regards to someone terminally ill who the doctors say has no hope to live and he is suffering immensely, praying for him to have a complete recovery is tantamount to a miracle and the world usually runs in a natural way. Thus, when a person is terminally ill, this is not considered like a sharp sword “lying on one’s throat”; rather, it is considered like the sword has already penetrated where only a true miracle can save this person and one should not pray for such things.
Summary: If one is terminally ill and the doctors do not give this patient any chance of living, one should not pray for him to live or die. Rather, one should pray that may Hashem have mercy on this individual and allow him to live, but if the decree upon this individual has already been sealed, may Hashem remove his suffering and do to him as He wishes.
Let us now relate an incident that happened several years ago. There was a person who was unfortunately in a vegetative state for many years. His wife suffered tremendously, for she saw her life wasting away before her since her husband would not recover and she would live out her entire life without having children. When Maran Shlit”a heard about this, he arrived at the home of the ill man and proceeded to perform a “Tikun” (corrective ceremony) quoted by the works of the Mekubalim in the presence of ten men. Immediately following the Tikun, the ill man passed away in peace.
