This coming Monday is Tu Be’av, the Fifteenth of Av, about which our Sages tell us in the Mishnah in Masechet Ta’anit (26b), “Rabban Shimon ben Gamliel said: There are no better days for the Jewish nation than the Fifteenth of Av and Yom Kippur, for the young women of Jerusalem would go out in borrowed white garments and dance in circles in the vineyards.” The Gemara explains that on this day, many young Jewish women, especially the destitute ones, would begin the process of marriage and it is for this reason that the day of Tu Be’av is indeed a joyous day.
Let us therefore discuss some of the pertinent laws of the Mitzvot of marriage and being fruitful and multiplying (bearing children).
The Mitzvah of Being Fruitful and Multiplying
Our holy Torah states (Bereshit 1, 27): “And Hashem created the man in His image, in the image of Hashem did He create him; he created them as male and female. Hashem blessed them and said, ‘Be fruitful and multiply; fill the land and conquer it.”
We derive from this verse the positive Mitzvah for every Jewish man to marry a woman and fulfill the commandment to be fruitful and multiply of which the objective is to bear a boy and a girl.
The Sefer Ha’Chinuch (Mitzvah 1) explains the reason for this Mitzvah: “We were commanded to perform this Mitzvah in order for the world to be inhabited, for Hashem wishes for the world to be inhabited, as the verse states, ‘So says Hashem, creator of the heavens, He is the G-d, creator of the land and its maker: He has not created it to lay desolate, he has formed it to be inhabited.’ Hashem created the world with the intention of it being inhabited, not to lay desolate, for in this way, all of the Mitzvot of the Torah can be fulfilled.” This Mitzvah is therefore considered very great (which includes several halachic ramifications) for it is the root of the fulfillment of all of the Mitzvot of the Torah.
Getting Married For the Sake of Heaven
Several Rishonim, including the Ramban and Ra’avad, write that one must focus his intentions for the sake of Heaven, especially with respect to the Mitzvah to get married, for if one’s intention is not for the sake of Heaven and only marries in order to fulfill one’s personal desires like the other nations of the world, one has not fulfilled this Mitzvah suitably.
Are Women Included in the Mitzvah of Marriage
The Mishnah in Masechet Yevamot (65b) states: “Men are commanded to be fruitful and multiply but women are not.” The Gemara derives from verses that women are not commanded in this Mitzvah. The Poskim as well as Maran Ha’Shulchan Aruch (Even Ha’Ezer, Chapter 1) rule likewise. The Rambam writes that nevertheless, a woman should not remain unmarried. Rabbeinu Nissim (beginning of Chapter 2 of Kiddushin) writes that although a woman is not commanded to be fruitful and multiply, she certainly fulfills a Mitzvah by getting married. The Sefer Magen Avraham writes that women are commanded in the Mitzvah of “He has not created it to lay desolate, He has formed it to be inhabited,” for this verse teaches us that it is Hashem’s will that men marry women and women be married to men; this Mitzvah indeed applies equally to both men and women. (We cannot delve into this matter any further at this time.)
